In honor of the New Year, I urge you to take a minute and declare your independence – from everything! Perhaps you want to celebrate the coming spring, the Equinox, Freethinker’s Day (January 29th) or someone or other’s birth – reasons abound – but whatever your excuse, why not show solidarity to a bit of Fremont funny business.

Stand up. Or don’t. Far be it from me to dictate. We here at the Chamber insist on your “Freedom to Be Peculiar” (De Libertas Quirkas, motto of the Artist’s Republic of Fremont or ARF). Sit down, if you like, or lean against the wall with fingers spread on the floor and your feet aimed at the Solstice sun.

Are you comfortable? Not that we require you to be comfortable. Make yourself uncomfortable if that is your bent. After all, one motto of the Fremont Arts Council is “Don’t tell me what to do!”

So do as you wish.

You might, at this point, put your hand over your heart, or on your head, or under your foot. Nothing is wrong, and nothing is right. However, if you put it over someone else’s heart, you might interfere with their independence.

Once you’ve selected appropriate hand gestures, you might choose to recite the Venerated Fremont Pledge of Independence:

Forever unshackled, independent, uninhibited and free.
To keep my spirit unfettered and unencumbered is key.
Where we follow the spirit of a troll,
and where everything is whimsical and droll,
in Fremont, I choose my own path and just Be.

Of course, if this pledge isn’t for you, might I suggest the
Ceremonious pledge – Liberty always! Liberty always! (repeat as necessary, or until ejected from the room.)

I’m not going to put words in your mouth. You might find the Absolute pledge more to your taste:

To he who would shackle my spirit, to her who would imprison my mind, to they that would tell me how I might live, to them that might attempt to lead me without my wish or will, I say, “No way, dude!”

The Sacred pledge might be too religious for some:

Upon the sacred ground under which the beer reserves flow, under a sky full of laughter, in the time-honored tradition of our Fremont forefathers (and earth mothers) I do avow never to waiver from a well-trod path of self-government and pure autonomy. Unless I want to.

Of course, this pledge can only be said while actually standing in certain areas of Fremont (where the beer reserves flow). I do not want to imply that these pledges can only be taken while in Fremont, or by a Fremonster. Fremont is a “state of mind” and the Fremont Chamber has long upheld the right of anyone to declare themselves in Fremont – no matter their zip code. Besides, we’re not in charge here. You are.

The Sacrosanct pledge goes something like this:

Iay romisepay otay lwaysaay ollowfay ymay wnoay athpay – ndependenceiay oreverfay ndaay legieceaay otay onay neoay.

It isn’t my style. I’ve never been good with foreign tongues.

A long history lies behind the Traditional pledge. It was written all
of three years and twenty minutes ago.

Whims and the wind may lead me, my spirit forever free, I do hereby swear my unswerving loyalty to that within me which leads and that without me that lends the freedom to find my own trail.

This makes it much more ancient than the Inviolable pledge, by at least twenty minutes.

In Fremont did the citizens a stately (if slightly silly) pleasure dome
decree,
Where under the Rocket, the sacred beer reserves ran, into mugs
measureless to man along the Hall of Giants Street.
Within the hallowed circle of this vaunted fearsome and frolicsome
fiefdom,
I do avow my ever-vigilant determination to set my own course.

You might want to recite the Standard pledge while lying curled in
a ball on the bottom of your hall closet.

Harketh oh the winds of change. Harketh oh the Troll. Here me now
pronounce my name and state my intended goal. I, (insert anything here), do swear to uphold the time honored tradition of Fremonsters past and listen only to my own whimsical nature.

Or not.

Of course, you might need to craft your own pledge, in your own
words, to state your independence. Remember, the Fremont Pledges
of Independence can be recited any time, anywhere and randomly by any group of people in need of a bit of Fremont-style independence.

Just anywhere, a group or country or neighborhood may ask you to
pledge allegiance to them – forever and ever. In Fremont, an Imagi-Nation, all we ask is that you declare yourself – forever and ever – to be yourself.

If you want to share that bit of yourself, and your own, hand-crafted pledge, please feel free to send it on to fremont@oz.net.

And all those in favor, say “ARF!”